fantasy fail.

My team's logo.

My fantasy football team (PMS Barbie) looks like a garbage can.

The names are good, but the performance is not. Historically, I have had a knack for picking under-performing teams in general, and an ever greater knack (at this point, I'll call it a skill) at benching players who then do extremely well. These aren't new. This year, these factors have been compounded by the fact that my starters love getting knocked out of game in the first quarter. Jeremy Maclin and Aaron Hernandez in Week 2. Laurant Robinson in Week 3. (Though, truth be told, I didn't mean to start the last one in the first place.) As one can imagine, those big fat zeros have killed my team.

Last week, my woes were compounded by a poor decision that I made by going with my heart instead of going with my gut. Context: I have been an Eagles fan since birth, but they are looking rather garbage-y this season. Michael Vick is a turnover machine, the O-Line is in shambles, and the defensive secondary is missing Assante Samuel, like, really bad. (Hey Andy, Cut Nnamdi. Thanks.) My backup defense is the Cardinals, and they have been killing it this year. My starting defense, the Steelers, not so much. So last week, the Eagles played the Cardinals. Everything in my gut said "Play the Cardinals!" But my heart - and my dad and every male Eagles fan on my Twitter feed - said "Don't go against your team!" After my dad laid the biggest guilt trip on me ever, I went with my heart... and lost big. Like, huge. Like, Cardinals +22, Steelers -1 huge. (For my non-fantasy football player readers, defenses are never supposed to get 22 points. Ever.)

Even though I still would have lost with those 22 points (I lost by 24), I regret not starting the Cardinals the same way that I regret every time I don't follow my gut. My gut is never wrong! It is how I can look at one apartment for five minutes and rent it and still be satisfied over a year later. It is how I know what subway to take home, and whether or not I should wear rain boots on a cloudy morning. I'm so mad that I let my (irrational) attachment to the Eagles cloud my judgement about whom to start. I'm so mad I didn't pull a 'it's not personal, it's business' and do what I know is right. It'll never happen again... especially not next week when my Eagles play the Giants - totally starting Victor Cruz. Can't wait to see his salsa dance...

(The second thing I learned from this debacle is that guys are unable to make business decisions when sports are involved. They're like emotional babies. Good to know.)